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But then the wind started blowing, and it scattered the ashes into the flower garden. Now I've got a bunch of giant Tulips (my wife's favorite, no less) to contend with.....hmmmm, my wife . . . tulips . . . oh Hell, now I'm horny. These big horns started growing from my head and I started (baaaaa) getting this insatiabaaaaaaaale craving for (baa-ba-baaaaaaaa) vegetabaaaaaaals, maybe my probluuuuuuums are solllllllllllved! (baaaaa-baaaaaa)! Background music -- The Sorcerer's Apprentice No, wait: The mutant Bok Choy tulips are producing pairs of shears! But I don't look good in shears . . . maybe if I wait a while they'll come up with a pair of fishnets! So I started grazing on the Mutant tulips/bok choy/turnips and at first started feeling a bit queasy when I realized I was eating my wife! And all of a sudden I was horny again, so I started looking for another sheep, but with my four horns I kept on scaring the other sheep away (they used to be my neighbors).

Once upon a time, I thought them noisey and smelly, but now (with my wife dead and all) I have this compelling need to start a on class action lawsuit. Your do-hicky should be physically embedded in your concrete foundation (like in Mafia movies) since it is extremely dangerous. And to think all of this happened because I wanted larger turnips for throwing at Subarus from a distance, not for chunking into their windows at close range. But it's too late, the damage is done and it doesn't matter how loud the squeals