the setup:

A comany i used to work with had a really cool, laid back customer who had a wife who was a total pain in the ass. They are both in their 60's, have 2 grouwn kids, and more money than they'll ever know what to do with... One night, the customer's wife wanted to watch a movie... He asked her what she wanted to watch. She said 'anything'. So, the guy turns the Dish Network to the Extasy channel, and they watched porn all night. He told us this, and we all had a good laugh as we watched porn on the bigscreen in his living room while we pretended to work.

Fast forward a week or so...

We had a 17 year old kid working as our intern (ie, slave) for the summer. He would stare in awe at all the nice houses, and all the semi-nice equipment we installed (the owner of the company I was working with was a joke who didn't know good stuff when he saw it, btw).
While we were at the home of the customer mentioned above, the intern asked me what the homeowner did for a living... I said that the homeowner did nothing but film porn flicks all day, and that he was the largest pron distributor in Texas. This got the intern going- he was like.... "wow.. i want to go work for HIM!" This went on for a few hours, and was great fun... The homeowner was even in on the gag... We told the intern that the homeowner's wife had no idea what he does for a living, and that he has kept it hidden from her for 30 years- not even his kids knew, and that NO ONE could find out- he had to keep it a secret... LOL

So, the intern ran around and told all of his friends that he was working at the Porn King's house, and that he was going to be an intern on a porn set, etc...


A month later I told him the truth... to say he was disappointed is an understatement.. LOL

We still call that customer the Porn King- he thinks it's hilarious!

I spent my younger years as the class clown... more time in the principal's office than the classroom... who else do you know that got kicked out of elementary school for tossing a garter snake in the girls bathroom, inadvertantly hitting the meanest old bag teacher right in the cankles? God the scream was blood curdling!

I guess that streak has mellowed slightly in adulthood...but only slightly. We set up a car install manager on videocam one morning. We had scattered broken glass on the floor... left the door ajar and removed his big toolbox. Since he hd no insurance and the company didn't insure his tools, he actually knelt down on the ground and cried. Thats when we came out laughing... he must have forgotten to look at his calendar (April 1st).

I also once had a three flusher that wouldn't go down. The remnants were left in the shop toidy with a sign that said "Duane's Replication Lab... please do not disturb the Duanelets". This great looking girl shows up an hour early to drop off her car and the store is not open yet so Duane lets her use the restroom. Since his morning dump was like clockwork I didn't figure anyone else would see it first. I come back to the shop and he goes on about how hot this lady is and he thinks she likes him because she kept smiling at him! I removed the sign and never confessed... god I hope he's not reading this right now.

I was once the victim because I think people were finally tired of me. I literally spent the whole day with a neon pink "Gay Pride" sign on my back during a really busy sale day. Not one client or co-worker let me in on it but I was wondering why everyone seemed to be in such a good mood.

It's funny how many pranks revolve around the restroom.

We had a tech who came to work and always spent the first half hour there. The other guys couldn't stand it, so it began...

First, they put two McDonalds ketchups (those little ones in the plastic bags between the toilet seat and the toilet itself. So when he sits down, they explode all over him....

Then, we have this very thick, clear, viscous silicone stuff that we used to use to redamp your turntable so the arm would drop nice and slow to the record when you cued it down....they coated the toilet seat invisibly with this stuff. Old you know who took his customary seat and was just fine...until he tried to get up and left a few layers of tender flesh behind...

Okay, if you insist, another toilet prank:

Saran Wrap stretched tightly over the bowl is practically invisible.

Larry Flint used to have a "beaver hunt" contest in his mag. Don't have a clue if it's still there, but they used to pay $100.00 for any good spread they decided to publish. Be creative with the word spread :)

I dummied up Flint Publications letterhead and wrote something like this:
_________

Dear Mrs. White,

Thank you for your submission to Hustler Magazine's Beaver Hunt contest. We are pleased to inform you that your beaver will be included in our May edition! Your check for $100.00 will arrive approximately six weeks after publication, and we are including a one year subscription beginning with the May addition.
__________

Mr. White was an employee of mine. He happened to mention one day that him and his wife sometimes included a camera in their sex play. That was all I needed to know to perpetrate this prank. I typed the letter and dropped it in the mail box on March 31st. I clued in the other employees the next day at the start of business.

Early in the afternoon, one of the guys took a call from Mr. White's wife. "Hey Jim, your wife's on the phone and it sounds like somethings wrong!" he said. We all crowded around Jim when he answered the call. He listened for a bit. He said things like "No, I didn't." and "I can't imagine how." and "Honestly honey, I really didn't!" All the while turning white as a ghost. Finally he hung up the phone.

I asked him what was wrong, and he told me. We were all amazed with his story (hehe) and then I asked him to call his wife back and ask her who signed the letter.

I had signed it April Foolery :)

This message was edited by HDTVJunkie on 05/09/04 02:03.

P.S. They are still married. Jim thought it was the funniest thing that he was ever victimized with. His wife, I think, is still angry with me. :)

I was about to ask you how the hell you ork a cow, as a joke, when I saw that you actually put the dash after the W.

Omigod, there's more than one of my sense of humor out there!


This one was mean to every contractor but us -- a guy I was working with found a few dessicated rats under a house in the Hollywood Hills. He took two of them and placed them a few feet inside the crawl entry so that if you went in quickly, you would see them dead ahead, pun intended. They looked like a couple of muppet rats.

Besides having literature from Hair Club for Men sent to my follically challenged ex boss, we had a new saleman start at this large interconnect company I once worked at and he closed his first deal. One of the vets walked him up to me and said tell him about running around the office in his drawers to celebrate his first sale. I told him with a straight face of course, every salesman did it. We also had a telemarketing department so there were about 60 people at work and this was a shirt and tie environment. He goes into the vice presidents office then jumps out sans pants, runs up the hall and disappears down a corridor. Needless to say we were crying from laughing so hard.

the cow-orker thing is from Dilbert.. it describes people you work with who just don't have a clue...

they're also known as induhviduals

We had a coworker that was in the dumper every day at the same time. One day we rigged a smoke bomb with some wire and a model rocket ignitor so we could light it off remotely. We patiently waited for him to get settled and just after first grunt, we lit it off and slid a large box in front of the door. Needless to say he never used the toilet at work again.

I had been promoted to manager of the speaker factory, and one of our best line workers created the habit of spending twenty minutes in the stall just before the morning break -- for which he was never late.

I had the gall to tell him that, since he apparently found that he needed to and could go to the bathroom at the same time every day, I would appreciate it if he could do whatever was necessary to change that so that he was at home during that particular time of day. He had not even noticed that it was a habit! And he never did it again.

I have too many of these since I am the prankster at any job I have, but since these are mostly toilet oriented I'll keep the theme.

I once rigged a mic behind a toilet and a couple of speakers and amp (tube guitar amp) in the cabinet. This ended up with the effect of taking every sound that occured in the bathroom and playing it for everyone throughout the place. 90db of toilet paper tearing, and serious spl for the payoff.

That reminds me! Ive been meaning to get a new pickup
for my TUBA!

Here's one that was downright mean.

Back when cutoff jean shorts was the fad, it used to be the big joke to light the little threads of someone else's jean shorts on fire. Many times someone would light these little guys and they would sizzle and burn for thirty seconds beofre the person realized and freaked out.

One day the guy who was notorious for lighting eveyone's short threads was wearing a pair with some long 'wicks' and someone had to get him, so my buddy goes over there and lights him up while he is bent over working on something. He doesn't notice and proceeds to find a friend of his because he has a present for him, he finds the buddy, bends over and let loose a fireball of flatulence, one that gave him third degree burns in the worst of places.

In case I ever forget, I need only come here to remind myself why I prefer to work alone.