I know how much the high-end CI world loves home security, but in our area it is a necessary evil. Had a customer call when her keypad at the garage door was beeping. She said the keypad reads "AC FAILURE, but I checked, and my air conditioning is working fine"

I'm sure we have plenty of these humorous happenings, and would love to hear some of them

Funniest Line from a customer:

"...yeah everything works great, thanks for finishing up so quickly, can I pay you next month?"

The repair segment has plenty of its own:

"Can you check out my RCA Victim?"

"Do you work on record chargers?"

"I have one of those Hibachi TVs in my motor home."

"It must be something minor. It was working fine yesterday"

"I think it just needs cleaning." (After sparks were reported.)

"I can buy one of those cheaper at the flea market."

"I used that test CD with the 747 flying by. Everything was great until the plane landed, then the sound went out."

"I need it right away" (how long has it been broken?) "Since last year."

"Instead of repairing this under warranty, can you just give me a new one?"

"I shouldn't have sprayed WD40 all over my cassette deck?"

"I took my camcorder to the beach and it was kinda windy. Do you think you can fix it?" (Hint: you'd better start watching the ads.)

"My neighbor is an engineer and he thinks it's something simple." (Which railroad does he work for??)

"I know what's wrong with this." (Then why are you bringing it to me for service?)

"Everything works fine on this but ________ " (insert major complaint of your choice)

And on, and on, and on..... do you think the book will sell?

Years ago,

Sony camcorder customer convinced product is dead on arrival. Tape inside of the unit, must get it out, red faced, pissed off, I'll never buy another, you get the picture.

Pull the camera apart, moisture everywhere, finally get the tape out and loaded, and lo and behold, a home movie of baby's first bath. From underwater.

Oh, yeah, customer wants to return new cassette deck "can't see the display!" so I plug it in. The LED metering is working but he says it's too blurry. I peel the opaque plastic protective covering off the display and he says, "Oh, that's better. Thanks!"

or the Sony Tv customer, complaining about the defective set with the orange dots in the upper corner.

"can you install this Bose system I just bought?"

HA HA!! Love it.

I had a customer ask me once how they managed to safely put the plasma into the screens. He thought it referred to the plasma emissions from a nuclear explosion!

"My wife just had an accident, do you know how to unclog a toilet?"

"Buddy, keep your hot little wife out of Arby's and don't ever show me anything like that again."

Not the funniest, but I always love it when you tell them your hourly rate to for instance move someone elses equipment to another room or the other side of the room and their response is " Oh I'm sure it will take you less than an hour."

With just a few weeks left on the warranty:

Can't you just TELL the manufacturer to send a new one instead of sending this one back for repair?

I know the warranty runs out in two days, but we're having a party in two days, so we want it taken care of AFTER the party (And also, after the warranty expires)?

That's hilarious!

"Why FOUR of the larger speakers in the ceiling?? Can't ONE of those little speakers work in the dining room??" (which was more like a dining HALL, easily 15'x30' with 12' ceilings)

"My neighbor has that "bosey" system in his living room and I know those little speakers can get pretty loud!!. I like the look of yours better, but I will only be playing music at about half that loud as his living room. I figure one could do it if they are as good as the Bosey's."

I created the lighting analogy that day to discuss coverage. I still use that all the time.

I compare multiple speakers to multiple rows of can lights, with the other option being a single 150W bulb in the middle of the room garage style.

We put 4 speakers in, and they like it... The ONE time per year that they step foot in that room anyway.

I do like that analogy.

I've used my truck to explain multiple speakers. Turn the radio on to a nice low level volume, then move everyone away from the truck.



Nothing like $2400.00 worth of speakers in a Dining Room......lol