Crestron enables someone to provide you with a total solution package. I don't think that the package you described would give you sticker shock. I will leave it to your local dealer to do the actual quotation, however.
The problem with someone selling you hardware, is that they are required to support the product. If something breaks, or if you break something, then it will have to go back to the dealer for service. You are an unknown quantity to the dealer. He is right in not wanting to sell something when he has no guarantee that it will be installed correctly and/or programmed as required.
You would basically have to write up some sort of contract or agreement that the dealer would not have to provide support in design, installation, and service only to the extent covered by waranty and that any service not covered by waranty would be paid by you. Even then, he still may not consider it worth it to make some money on a hardware only sale, only to adopt a possible headache.
I personally would go to the dealer, meet the programmer or see their finished product. Then see what type of total package they can offer. Although it may be more expensive, it may be the only possible way of making sure that it will do everything you want it to in the end.
If you do take the independent / hobbyist approach, you can find almost everything you need on ebay. Make sure that you don't pay too much, though, because it is unsupported hardware w/o waranty... buyer beware. This will save you a alot of money, but you will be responsible for getting it to work. The thing with Crestron, things will tend to not work at all until perfect, then it snaps in place. Its not like you will get partial value from the system until it is done right.
