I have been slammed over the past couple of months and haven't posted at all. I do scan RC a couple times a day to see what's going on. It seems like the wild west in the past few weeks.

I choose to stay out of the fray on purpose.

Today is another blue sky, picture post card day here in the San Diego area. Unfortunately, I am heading out the door to support some good friends who are burying their child today. He was 21 years young and had battled depression along with a more recent diagnosis of bi-polar. Sometime in the middle of the night last Wednesday, feeling that there was no other option, he walked to a 3 story building, made his way to the top and jumped off committing suicide.

Anyone with a soul would have compassion for this. Anyone with a child refuses to even imagine this scenario. Being close to the family of this young man, and seeing their pain leaves you without words because sorry isn't big enough.

Sometimes we all need a bit of perspective in our life. Today will be filled with emotions for everyone at this service. Seeing our good friends in this pain will never be forgotten.

Let things go, take care of what's important and make sure that the people in your life that give it meaning know it. If you are going to write threads, or comment on threads that you know are going to cause a torrent of fire, maybe redirect that same energy into something positive here or somewhere else.

Peace.

Sorry for your loss, Jeff. While i have experienced depression, suicide seems so foreign to me. I can't imagine what must be going through someones minds when they find themselves on that path. Whats even more puzzling and alarming is how most of us can relate because of a family member or friend. Funerals are terrible places to be but they sure do dial in ones perspective and list of priorities.

Please share my condolences to your friends family.

My Condolences Jeff...I agree with Mac, Even though ive never been diagnosed with depression I show the signs and worry my self sometimes, Although these symptoms haven't been present in the last couple of years. I have never ever once thought suicide as a way out, and seems so foreign to me. A girl I went to highschool with decided the only way out was to off herself a few months ago. The sad thing was nobody even knew the demons she was battling. Although I didnt know her that well I do know everyone that was close to her and how horrible her deed hurt everyone around, her parents are now getting a divorce because of it, her grandma had a heart attack a few weeks ago and her sister is now in a mental home for suicidal thoughts and showing homicidal signs (they were extraordinarily close and blames herself for her sisters death)

Although I can never imagine what people that battle suicidal thoughts have I have absolutely no sympathy for them, It does nothing but destroy the people closest to them and is truly is a selfish way out.

If anyone here is battling demons PLEASE KNOW there is help for you, please please PLEASE talk to those around you, there is also a suicide hotline you can call if things get bad enough. There is NOTHING in this world bad enough to off your self and put those closest to you in that type of pain. You may not feel that people around you care for you but they do.

Damn. People need to be more willing to seek and accept help.

Sorry to see this- take care of each other.

I don't think suicidal people are healthy enough to know or care how their actions affect those around them. I don't think that "sane" people can gauge whether or not they are being cowards or selfish. In fact i would wager that in most cases they already feel so invisible that their thoughts of a world without them would be a good thing for those around them.

The human mind is still a huge mystery. This could be a chemical imbalance created by diet or brain damage caused at a sporting event or abnormally formed brain that lacks or has too much of something that is operating normally for the rest of us.

In my own personal experience i have struggled with smoking and then weight. Smoking had such a hold on me for years and when i finally broke free i replaced it with junk food. I tried everything you can think of to quit smoking. The last 5 years i was disgusted by the habit but continued to smoke anyway. A combination of things happened all at once and i finally got free. I still struggle with diet.

When i was 16 i remember breaking up with my first girlfriend and thinking the world was going to end. A couple of days later i met another girl so i immediately understood that there are other fish in the sea etc. I can also remember being 23 and having a credit card maxed out at $3000...and laying awake at night for months stressed out because of my pending financial ruin. $3000 lol.

Bottom line is that even when we are relatively healthy (body/mind)...young or old...we worry about things. Our behaviors and vices drag us down, poor choices are easy to make. Imagine what its like dealing with the drama of every day life when your brain isn't working properly.

Every time I spoke with people who were family members, friends or co-workers of someone who committed suicide said they didn't see it coming, but had noticed changes in the person. Unfortunately, the list of the people I have known who ended their lives is far too long. The one common thing is that the person had seemed to be getting things in order and they seemed somewhat calm- I have also read that it's the one thing someone can control when their life is out of control or when some insurmountable obstacle shows up. If the person has tended to be fairly emotionally stable and they do this, it comes as more of a shock but some signs may be apparent.

I think the people who consider this 'selfish' or 'cowardly' haven't thought about it much and never bothered to consider life from someone else' perspective. My cousin's daughter attempted it and failed- a bit messed up, physically, but now, she feels lucky to be alive and councils people who are considering it.

Thanks for the condolences which I will pass on to our friends. Returning from the service, it was heartfelt as expected with so many lifetime pictures formulated into great videos of his life from infant to the end. Not many dry eyes in the place. So tough to see such great parents and friends go through this. Their journey to recovery is a long one.

His dad had a very poignant statement about his son knowing the love and support from his family and friends but finally giving into the demons overtook him. I think it is impossible for most of us that don't have real depression or other mental health issues to completely understand. He also went on to say that every time his son left the house he didn't know if it would be for the last time because he had previous attempts. Other that locking him in a room the possibility was always there.

All any of us can do us friends is be there to support and hope to God that it doesn't show up in your child or anyone close to you.

Like I wrote in the opening thread, so much of life is perspective. Most of us fight one type of demon or another. Days like this make you take stock of your own life and really appreciating your family and friends while they are here.

Precious and too short. Life is an incredible rollercoaster, but going through it with pain that just doesnt make sense is amazingly hard. You cant shake it off, you can't reason with it, you can'tsuck it up. Sadly, many times people just dont understand what is going on behind the scenes, whether its their own head, or someone they love. Many times by the time help is available its too late.

Jeff, I'm sorry for your loss. I pray that I never know what it feels like to loose a child. It isnt something a parent should have to feel, but sadly is a part of life sometimes.

Best wishes.

A friend of mine from high school recently took her life. Even worse, her son found her. I can't imagine what was going through her head that things got to that point.

Sorry to hear about your friend Jeff!!

One of the best posts I have read on this forum. Thank you Jeff.

Thanks Amir.

Wow, sorry for your loss.

In the last week I have learned via an old friend of the deaths of two business owners that I spent a fair amount of time around in my early 20s.
And the suicides of two high school classmates. One over marital issues, the other had financial problems that he didn't see a way out of. Both left wives and kids behind
And the death of same friend's dad.

My mother is in the end stage of her losing battle with cancer. I am on hiatus from dealing with business stuff for the immediate future as my family and I deal with it.

To top it all off, I got a call early this morning from a childhood friend who told me that his older sister had lost her final battle with cancer. Growing up, our families were very close. She was 45.

Life is fragile and too damn short.

Also sorry to hear of your situation. Having an immediate family member affected is brutal when you see what they're going through.

By far the toughest thing I have ever dealt with.