It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic.


News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from
his wife Heather Mills-McCartney. Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be
distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She
said in an earlier briefing, "I have no idea why this has happened,
I'm really stumped"

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she
will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk
out on a relationship like this"

After his break up with Heather, Paul was asked if he would ever
consider going down on one knee again. Paul said he would prefer it
if we called her Heather.

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to
the marriage. Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world,
and if an agreement has been signed it is believed that she won't
have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split which have suggested that infidelity
may have been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always
trying to get her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the
cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said, "he would get
home at night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present
that Paul bought her prior to the wedding. He gave her a new
prosthetic leg for Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler.

A miner in Africa has an accident and loses a leg. He says to his
mate "I'm f---ed, who will want a one legged gold digger?" His mate
says "try Paul McCartney"


Finally a poem by Sir Paul McCartney:

I lay upon a grassy bank, My hands were all a quiver, I slowly
removed her suspender belt and her leg fell in the river.


These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please. Now
she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another woman who
can fill her shoe.