I know I am going to get hammered for this, but...

I need a suggestion for a remote control...All of my stuff is Sony, except for my cable box.

That is my problem. It is a Nexus descrambler box...I would appreciate any suggestions as to what remote would work with it.

thanks and peace,
Sam

Thanks, I'll have a heapful of Mercy please. I'll use the extra for when I need it.

John, pretty selfish, taking Mercy w/o giving...don't ya think?

I'd go with anything besides a Pronto Sam. :)

He may take you up on that. Be prepared
to leave at moments notice.:)

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 Show No Mercy   If you are a chubby guy in your 20's who reads comic books and has a strange beard you might as well donate your penis and testes to science, since they is no way you're gonna need them. Luckily you don't really need them to read comic books. Recently I saw a t-shirt that read - I support 2 teams, New Zealand and whoever's playing Australia -. This amazed me since I thought it was unique to the classic and highly creative Edmonton vs Calgary CFL football rivalry. I can wait to see where this joke will be in the future. - I support 2 types of proton-soccer cyborg squadrons, the Terran Alliance and whoever's playing the Keyhole Nebula -. Now that sucks. Show no mercy popped into my head as an amusing thing to title some writing, but I have no topic. I was gonna write about how AIDS and CANCER jokes are so funny, but that might be a little too edgy. I could tell a story, that sounds alright. My friends are some of the coolest and biggest bastards on this earth. Why are they so cool? I have no idea, but they are a collection of the funniest and brightest wunderkind overlooked by the society. And so like me, or a giant shit trapped in a toilet, they spin too big too go down, but imprisoned in the flushing spiralling vortex. Someone call Richard Pryor, I now have officially made 3 more comedy shit analogies than him and I'm not even 30. My friend brodie bruce and another guy invented this thing they call the shotgun tour, which is them going out to the bars and shotgunning beer cans in the alley to save money and live on the edge. If you don't know what shotgunning is, its when you punch a hole near the base of a beer can with a sharp object like a car key or switchblade, and then open the can and guzzle. One of the funnier aspects of the shotgun tour is that they usually wind up throwing up in the alleys. Unfortunately I find throwing up as equally not good as christian punk rock so I stay out of the shotgun tours. But I did do it once and it was pretty funny since there was 10 of us and we were all wearing our drinking suits, we spread out and randomly all over the alley to maximize cop exposure and punch, fizz, success! About 4 years ago me and about 20 other people I know met up at this girls apartment downtown and we all walked to a club. I had no money so I bought a 6 pack of old stock tallboys and drank 2 on the way. When we got there I knew it would be impossible to sneak all 4 into the bar so I hid them in a cardboard box I found in the alley behind the bar. I went out every half hour with some random friend or other to drink one. I drank them one by one, and on trip #4 I reached into the box to pull out my last beer and noticed the box was full of mannequin heads. Holy fuck! Within 2 seconds the alley was full of 20 of us and a blizzard of mannequin heads. We threw them at each other, at the roof, at the girls(who weren't impressed), it was a madhouse. 2 types of people drink in alleys, bums, and me and my friends. Turns out the bums are geniuses. I couldn't think of a better idea if you gave me 1000 years. Well I gots knock off on my wheels, but dontshakethebaby be gettin' back at you with all them marbles. Show No Mercy   You lied. You stole our land. You murdered our people. Your ancestors preached from the Good Book. They were ignorant to their own words. A disgrace to their own faith. You've made much banter about your own Batan march. You hide your eyes to our own Trail of Tears. Your forefathers were hypocrites. "All men are created equal ...." Words written by a slave owner. For a people who were themselves slaves. What flag did two hundred Sioux men, women and children see at Wounded Knee on Pine Ridge in December 1890? In November 1864 at Sand Creek Colorado another massacre of four hundred Cheyenne Indians who were in the process of surrendering occurred under its authority. The flag was in the chambers of the US Supreme court as the Justices made their decision in the case of Dred Scott in 1857. Two years later it was represented by the US Marines who captured the raiders of Harper's Ferry and it was there at John Brown's trial. It was atop the US Capital in 1838 when Congress decreed that the southern Appalachians no longer belonged to the Cherokee and that they should be forced to march to Oklahoma along the "Trail of Tears." It represents a Congress which squanders, wastes, defrauds the people's money at the drop of a bribe. It represents a country which replaced outright slavery with economic slavery. It is present at mostly all klan rallys, being waved and paraded around by the same group of people waving and parading the other flag. It represents the same government that brought about Waco and another Wounded Knee killing in more recent years. It represents a society plagued with organized crime and criminals. It is atop business buildings that make use of sweat shop labor , poverty strickened migrant farm labor. It is in the courtrooms where every mis-carriage of justice is decided. The homeless, hopeless street people; the runaway, thrown away kids see it everywhere as a nation of politicians that don't really care. Everything that is bad, wrong, immoral and unethical in the States is there in this flag. It flys in front of every business, company, corporation that rapes our land; drains our resources; makes profit out of our children's heritage. It was there at the Mai Lia massacre, in front of VA hospitals with those forgotten, neglicted men inside from a war no one wanted. Morgan built his railroad on the broken backs of Chinese slaves. It was waved at Ellis Island full of hate for each incoming wave of unwanted immigrants. Our people were called savages, not even counted as humans. Bury your head in its folds. Hide your face in its blood red strips. Shroud your shame with its patriotism. Plead for mercy for all its ill deeds. You'll have none from me. I show no mercy.  Show No Mercy   "I'm not eating my vegetables - they've got black bits on." "DO YOU WANT ME TO DRIVE YOU OVER THE BORDER AND GIVE YOU A SMACK?" They'll have to build a special layby on the outskirts of Berwick-upon-Tweed with a sign saying "Welcome to England; Smacking Area - 200 yards". Little stalls will spring up selling brussels sprouts and broccoli and stationery for writing thank-you letters for Auntie's birthday present. The plan is to ban the smacking of children under three, so now instead of "Wait till your father gets home," toddlers will be told, "Just you wait until your third birthday." But the proposals have received a surprisingly positive response in the tough estates of Glasgow. In response to the question "Do you think parents should be allowed to give their kids a little smack?" most people answered "No, maybe just a bit of crack cocaine every now and then." Of course, smacking has been only the symptom of a historical problem - this ruling will do nothing to prevent the recurrent breakdown of negotiations between adults and their offspring. If the Scottish government is ruling out the use of force, then clearly more efforts will have to be made on the diplomatic front. The first step should be sporting sanctions. Parents will continue to play football with their children, but they will no longer be prepared to let their kids always win. "And the final score here from Jamie's back garden: Dad 27, little Jamie nil! And the six-year-old must surely be wishing now that he hadn't been rude to Grandma back when he was four." Games of hide and seek will be much quicker as parents find their children in under three seconds. "It's no good crying, Ellie. You've hidden behind that curtain four times in a row - of course I was going to look there first." Because if punishment is not to be physical, then it will have to psychological. "Night night, Rosie. And darling, you know you were scared that there was a great big bear that lived behind the cupboard on the landing. Well you're right, there is: a huge, fierce one with big sharp teeth and long claws! Anyway, sweet dreams darling." Other sanctions will include seizure of all comfort blankets and being honest about how crap their drawings are. But eventually the civilised example of Scotland will spread to the rest of the country, if only because government ministers find it impossible to negotiate with children's representatives. "At Downing Street today, talks have broken down between the pre-school children and the government. A draft proposal was put before the toddlers, but they reacted by scribbling on it and then putting it in and out of the water jug. When ministers objected, the two-year-olds lay on the floor kicking and screaming and then fell asleep on the rug." Before Westminster is prepared to follow the Scottish example, more concessions must be made by young children. If no violence is to be used against toddlers then they must undertake not to climb into bed at two in the morning and kick their dads in the bollocks. And it is no good them merely promising not to strike their little sisters with the plastic sword: their arms must be put permanently beyond use. Super soakers, spud guns, sharp bits of Lego left beside the bed; all these weapons must be decommissioned before the peace process can really proceed. But eventually it will be illegal to give a child a light slap on the back of the hand, (unless they are Iraqi kids, of course; you'll still be allowed to drop bombs on them). In the meantime, if you are tempted to strike a child in anger, they say you should make yourself count to 10 first. This either prevents you from using violence or results in your child growing up into a neurotic adult with an irrational fear of double figures. All parents will know that there are times when it feels as if smacking your child is the only possible response - like when my little boy announced that he supported Manchester United. I suggest reading Daniels Reviews. But even if a quick slap seems to work in the short term, there has to be a better way of punishing them. Wait till they're teenagers and meet them at school in purple checked golfing trousers. Visit them at university wearing a fur coat and a tiara. Wait till they have kids of their own and give your grandchildren a Slush Puppie and a king-size Mars bar before they go on the big dipper. And keep endlessly telling your kids, "We never smacked you as a child, and that's why you're not a violent person." And then our grown-up children will say, "I know I shouldn't really hit my parents, but sometimes it's the only thing that works." Show No Mercy   

Mr Klaatu,

Thanks for the recommendation...but you misunderstood my question.

This message was edited by Anthony on 07/21/02 02:18.03.

Oh, well then . . . cut off your finger and tie it to a really, really long wooden pole.



Something like this should work just fine.

Officer Anthony...

Point taken, I guess you are the Intermission Board Cop. Thanks for the warning...I know the routine...next time I get taken in. You did show me mercy...just like I requested. Thanks for being so kind.

Dear Mr. Berkowitz;

Welcome to your nightmare!

This message was edited by MrKlaatu on 07/23/02 05:43.14.

"Anything in the Intermission Forum is fair game"

Don't remember where I heard that.

JJP

John, pretty thin justification. You need to work on your defense mechanism skills...oh, I forgot, you did need some mercy, I will retract the above comments.

peace,
jay

I didn't know we were in a state of war.

Lighten up Jay, it's all in good humor. And if I'm not mistaken, from your original post, it's sounds like you were expecting this sort of behavior. We definately don't want to disappoint anyone.

JJP