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The following page was printed from RemoteCentral.com:
| Topic: | New Euro English This thread has 5 replies. Displaying all posts. |
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| Post 1 made on Tuesday June 21, 2005 at 10:43 |
Mr Griffiths It's my lucky day! |
Joined:
Posts: | February 2005
2,678 |
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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the European Union rather than German,
which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that
English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-
year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have
always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag
is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining
"ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
By the way this is a joke and not true...
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| Post 2 made on Tuesday June 21, 2005 at 13:47 |
goodnf Select Member |
Joined:
Posts: | October 2002
1,744 |
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Zat vas wery klevr. Zanks for ze laf!
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I'm just a sheep in wolf's clothing... |
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| Post 3 made on Tuesday June 21, 2005 at 14:10 |
Anthony Ultimate Member |
Joined:
Posts: | May 2001
28,870 |
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| Post 4 made on Tuesday June 21, 2005 at 14:53 |
djy RC Moderator |
Joined:
Posts: | August 2001
34,758 |
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On 06/21/05 14:10 ET, Anthony said...
lol, old but good I say that to the wife, but she just laughs at me.
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| OP | Post 5 made on Tuesday June 21, 2005 at 19:15 |
Mr Griffiths It's my lucky day! |
Joined:
Posts: | February 2005
2,678 |
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she doesnt read what you type on these forums does she djy? lol
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| Post 6 made on Thursday June 23, 2005 at 02:17 |
pilgram Loyal Member |
Joined:
Posts: | November 2004
5,684 |
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lol!
Y'all don't no nuttin' 'bout REAL english, duz ya!
Ifin uaz to ask my uncle Delbert, he'd damn sure set ya strait!
(also a joke)
;-)
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