If you want to be treated like a professional, act like one.
Call a doctor or a lawyer and see how long you can talk on the phone for free before you get asked for a scheduled / paid office appointment.
If you keep doing things for free -- that's your own fault.

You can go on WebMD but still chose to see a doctor.
You can use legalzoom but still talk to a lawyer (when it really counts).

Spend few minutes on the phone to qualify them, discuss your onsight fee schedule and setup a consultation appointment.
Bill for your time, quotes and design.

The other side of that though is you make an appointment to see a doctor, then wait in the lobby for 45 minutes past your appointment, then they take you to a room where you wait another 30 to 45 minutes before the doctors show up.

doctors and lawyers also are licensed, highly regulated and heavily insured, not to mention the costs/school to become one. So I understand their fees. I'm not near qualified enough to compare my designing/installing a Media Room with open-heart surgery.
Most everyone In my market will do onsite/proposals for free - not just the trunkslammers, even the large established companies (Even Magnolia). Its just the nature of our market. I personally know just about every AV business owner within a 200 mile radius.
if you are able to pick and choose clients and charge them for this - then you need to be thankful that your market is not as competitive as ours.
it sucks.

Thanks for the tip. I'll check it out.

Craig

Edit: googling portal brings up loads of options. Can you please provide a link or a more detailed search term I can use?

Thanks.

Rare but not unheard of. I have a client that hired the typical loud, pound chest look at me, I am great type of designer. She sold them a couch that power reclines and runs off a rechargeable battery. I had to lend her an extension cord to charge it as she did not have one. She never planned ahead to ensure there was an outlet installed under the couch position. Well, the battery doesn't really hold a charge and he client now has an ottoman that permanently sits in front of the couch.

Portal.io

Look in your phone book under attorneys and count how many there are. Then go to the AV Integrators and look up how many there are. Lawyers can be found by the thousands every where.

Pretty much any other trade contractors do free estimates/consults around here. Roofers, painters, landscapers, fencers, concrete guys, electricians, plumbers, you name it. If I were looking to get my roof done, and I called 12 contractors, and 11 of them offered free estimates/onsite consultation, and 1 wanted to charge me $200, I would probably pick 1 of the other 11. :)

We are not like any basic trades, they do very simple things that are easy to estimate, no design is required. If you do quick hang and bangs then maybe, but anything more than that needs a real system design. That takes time and costs money. We are basically interior designers for technology, how much do interior designers charge and do they do designs for free? Every market has guys who will run around and give “proposals” for free, that dosen’t mean that you can’t provide better to people who are willing to pay for service. Some people shop for the lowest price and others shop based on quality/value.
To answer the op’s question about how to discussing pricing, it all comes down to sales process.
Qualify them over the phone.
At first meeting explain what you offer and show them examples as well as your design documentation. Let them pick what they want, tell them the price of what they have selected and shut up. They will either agree or ask about less expensive options. When they have picked what they want sign a design agreement with a budget for the system. Collect check for design time.
Second meeting present design. They either accept and you sign the contract and collect a deposit or they request changes. Bill hourly for changes and present again in meeting three.
That’s the basics but if you want more read Ira Freidman’s book Companion Selling.

10 years ago no one in our field charged for walkthroughs. Now it's getting better and a number of businesses do (including us). Our quality of client went up when we started charging for these in-home meetings.

If you think about the time you spend driving to the house, meeting with the customer, driving back to the office and then putting an estimate together, it's probably a 3-4 time time expenditure for many projects. There is no way that you should be expected to do that for free. Now if all other trades could figure this out as well, it would make it easier for all of us.

Thank you very much.

Craig