Just had this in an email from the father-in-law . . .


IDIOT SIGHTING #1
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a £5 note. Our total was £4.20, so I also handed her a 20 pence piece. She said, 'You gave me too much money.'
I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.'
She sighed and went to get the Manager who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but we do not do that kind of thing.'
The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change..
Do not confuse the clerks at MacDonald's.

IDIOT SIGHTING #2
We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.'
I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two..'
We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park, near Watford.

IDIOT SIGHTING #3
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the
Highways Department to request the removal of the 'DEER CROSSING' sign
On our road.
The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of road! I don't
Think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
Story from Potters Bar, Hertfordshire.

IDIOT SIGHTING #4
My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a Taco. She
Asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had Iceberg Lettuce.
From South Oxhey, Hertfordshire.

IDIOT SIGHTING #5
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport
employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
Knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I
know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened at Luton Airport

IDIOT SIGHTING #6
The traffic light on the corner buzzes when it's on red and safe to cross the
road. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged friend of mine.
She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She is a Local County Council employee in Harrow, Middlesex.

IDIOT SIGHTING #7
When my husband and I arrived at our local Ford dealer to pick up our
Car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the
Service Department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the
Driver's door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door
Handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'its open!'
His reply: 'I know. I already did that side.'
This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans, Hertfordshire.


But being in something of a reminiscing mood (see elsewhere for details) I actually have one of my own . . .


A number of years ago the wife and I, after doing a little shopping, decided to get a bus home. I went on first, carrying the shopping, with the wife following behind to pay for the tickets.
"Can't accept that," says the driver, "too much change."
Okay there were a number of 1 and 2p coins, but it was either that or a £10 note.
"I'll take the note," says the driver, who then turns around to discover he hasn't enough change. However, rather than eat a little humble pie, he takes the note, gets out of the cab and goes to a colleague to change it; he then returns and hands the change to the wife. The irony of this little tale though is that if the wife and I had bought separate tickets there would have been no problem.