In my world we have 'software engineer'. That's safe enough and most folks don't know what it actually means, but don't want to seem like they don't, so they'll smile and leave it at that.

I always feel a little pompous though calling myself an 'engineer' really. OTOH, and I guess 'engineer' seems a little pedestrian a description for what I do, which is really closer to 'logician' than anything to do with building things. But 'Logician Monk' isn't likely to go over well.

If the person asking is cute, I can always go with 'technical entrepreneur' which implies I may be working on an IPO as we speak.